Took a look at the notes last year. It was rainy and cold this time last year too. Very gloomy.
The sun came out briefly this afternoon, shining on the boxes all over the floor. it looked so unfamiliar. i haven’t seen sunshine in my room for so long. (no, not during the time in HK). Yet the sunlight was pale, almost silver. It looked like a sun at the end of the world.
It is hard to not feel that we are getting closer to the end of the world. they have been talking about 2012. I usually take such predictions as bullshit and i am not interested in that movie, either. But now i am starting to get a little persuaded.
So many natural disasters recently. And in our daily life, we simply find the weather getting more and more unusual. There had been major climate change in the early times and the entire population and culture were gone until thousands of years later, human activities reappeared in that region and many geological layers above. What makes things more dangerous now is that human beings have much more power to destroy Nature and thus expedite the self-destruction process. Literally speaking, this is just one circle. Human race should not in the first place expect to last forever. But how unsettling it is to be caught in the middle of this ugly process often imposed by those in power doing it for their own short term pleasure?
The system is getting more and more blatantly corrupt. I see human greed, hypocracy, cruelty and stupidity in full display. Is this the world that many “martyrs” fought so hard and died for? Harmony. What Harmony? How much should a dose of Confucius or patrotic brainwashing be effective to make people live in harmony with injustice?
Well i guess i have to be more positive and energetic. i will keep my mind focused on what i am supposed to do. but why does my mind constantly slip to a laid-back afternoon in the sunshine? but in such gloomy weather, my mind is paralyzed. If the end of the world is really just around the corner, what should i do now?
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